Really looking forward to your observations on French motherhood and womanhood. I lived and worked in France for two years during and after my French (and German) degree. I am struck by the French attitude to food (v important to eat good quality, fresh, seasonal etc) contrasting with their views on breastfeeding (it doesn't seem to be rated very highly or practiced much). And how this intersects with the culture around motherood, sexuality, patriarchy and women's bodies. I also found female friendships in France to be a peculiar beast.
Aww congrats! I’m off instagram so I didn’t the memo that you had moved. I moved from California to Austria 15 years ago so I can very much relate to the mixed feeling of excitement, fear and sadness. But, I miss less and less every year, and don’t regret it at all. I wish you a smooth transition- at least as smooth as can be expected. May the bureaucracy be ever in your favor . Some things are always going to be harder to adapt to ( like tiny parking spaces and very expensive freeways in France and filing taxes twice- especially as a freelancer!! Holy shit— get a good tax consultant !! ) and others will be easier to adjust to ( healthcare, food, weather). But it will
Be an amazing experience, and forever an unfolding adventure!!
My kids speak 3 languages, everyone always thinks they must be so smart but it’s actually due to very hard work on my part.
YES Elena, keep it coming: “The difference is more about how we USE our tax money in America. France spends about $60 billion annually on the military (which is about 2% of its GDP) whereas the US spends about $900 billion (about 3.5% of its GDP) and far more than any other country. We are too busy policing the world to give our citizens the basic necessities required to live happy, healthy lives.”
I absolutely adore you at your best: THIS type of writing. It’s so good. And so funny.
(I have such a love-hate relationship with your Sub: 99% of the time I’m like, “HALLELUJAH Someone hire this woman to run the world!” …. which comes to a screeching halt as soon as you write that ignoring children in nuclear-family Western societies is anything even remotely close to ignoring children in hunter gatherer societies. So I’ll be that incessant annoying commenter here to unfailingly set the record straight on those posts—as well as still come cheer and jump for joy when you write all the other lovely, thoughtful, insightful things you so often do. Like this wonderful piece. (And I’ll keep sharing these posts to all my friends!) Great work.
(Re)Bienvenue en France! I'm a reader from South west France its a beautiful region. Take it easy with the bureaucracy and settling in, we are looking forward to future articles
I was an au pair in Poitiers, France a decade ago and now I am mothering my own daughter in Austin, Texas and the differences are SO staggering. The amount of services and support that just exist in France is I think beyond comprehension for the average American. Looking forward to reading about your journey!
I'd love to read about comparisons between the USA and France in addition to your usually essays! I saw your post on ig about the toy car versus organic milk in both the USA and France, and I just thought: WHY?! I really do want to know why! I'd love a deep dive on the background regulatory, bureaucratic, economic environments that create that absurd situation... What are the supply & demand issues/subsidies/supply chain nuances/trade logistics, etc. behind these outcomes? I may be alone in thinking that would be interesting..😂 but if there's a researcher up to it - probably you, Elena! Félicitations pour votre déménagement!
I love that you want to know these things! So do I! My agent would like me to stay focused and she’s right 🤣 but at some point I’m sure I won’t be able to HELP looking into this because I want to KNOW!
I'm new to your publication, but as a Californian living in Québec who's spent a lot of time in the Southwest of France... everything about this article hit the spot for me! Wishing you every blessing for your family's new adventure!
Lovely post. Thrilled for you and your family (as I’ve commented before my family and I moved to Greece from Toronto for similar reasons 4 years ago). Hopefully your house hunt will be fruitful and mercifully short. In the meantime lean in to the yogurt and cheese; 10% strained Greek yogurt and bracingly large slices of feta cheese with figs got us through most of our immigration woes. Looking forward to reading more from you.
Welcome to life and motherhood abroad! I’m from Michigan but also lived for a short time in the Bay Area. I’ve been in Norway for 11 years with my Norwegian husband and we’ve been raising kids here for the past 6 of those. It’s such a gift to be over here (especially right now, and especially as a parent of little kids 😅) but also a life-long experience in grief for the home and life you left behind. Wishing you the best as you get settled!
I feel you on the trees!! I’ve lived in Europe for 10 years— 2 in Belgium and 8 in Ireland (originally from Pennsylvania). The only things I miss are proper woodland and proper summer! (The Irish literally declare a heatwave when it’s 74 Fahrenheit!) Anyways I am so looking forward to reading your observations about parenting etc in France!
Lovely! What a great story and reason for going. We’ll be “neighbors” as we’re moving to southern Germany this summer. I was nervous to send my kids to German school though. I thought it might be too stressful to be thrown into another language. They’re 6 and 4yrs old.
Really looking forward to your observations on French motherhood and womanhood. I lived and worked in France for two years during and after my French (and German) degree. I am struck by the French attitude to food (v important to eat good quality, fresh, seasonal etc) contrasting with their views on breastfeeding (it doesn't seem to be rated very highly or practiced much). And how this intersects with the culture around motherood, sexuality, patriarchy and women's bodies. I also found female friendships in France to be a peculiar beast.
I think this is all true. The patriarchy is definitely alive and well here even if they have more social services and support for mothers.
I am all here for any comparisons about raising children in the US vs France! Good luck with the house!
Thank you 🙏
Aww congrats! I’m off instagram so I didn’t the memo that you had moved. I moved from California to Austria 15 years ago so I can very much relate to the mixed feeling of excitement, fear and sadness. But, I miss less and less every year, and don’t regret it at all. I wish you a smooth transition- at least as smooth as can be expected. May the bureaucracy be ever in your favor . Some things are always going to be harder to adapt to ( like tiny parking spaces and very expensive freeways in France and filing taxes twice- especially as a freelancer!! Holy shit— get a good tax consultant !! ) and others will be easier to adjust to ( healthcare, food, weather). But it will
Be an amazing experience, and forever an unfolding adventure!!
My kids speak 3 languages, everyone always thinks they must be so smart but it’s actually due to very hard work on my part.
“May the bureaucracy be ever in your favor” 😆
Such a good read. I’m amazed that you can sit and write like this (beautifully and amusingly) when you have so much going on. Bon chance!
Complements of the jet lag. I like to sort out my thoughts (publicly) in the wee early hours when I can’t sleep 🤣
Came here to say just that. And jet lagged!
Would love to hear more observations on mothering and children in France vs the US. What an adventure though! Good luck with the house hunting!
Thank you 🙏
YES Elena, keep it coming: “The difference is more about how we USE our tax money in America. France spends about $60 billion annually on the military (which is about 2% of its GDP) whereas the US spends about $900 billion (about 3.5% of its GDP) and far more than any other country. We are too busy policing the world to give our citizens the basic necessities required to live happy, healthy lives.”
I absolutely adore you at your best: THIS type of writing. It’s so good. And so funny.
(I have such a love-hate relationship with your Sub: 99% of the time I’m like, “HALLELUJAH Someone hire this woman to run the world!” …. which comes to a screeching halt as soon as you write that ignoring children in nuclear-family Western societies is anything even remotely close to ignoring children in hunter gatherer societies. So I’ll be that incessant annoying commenter here to unfailingly set the record straight on those posts—as well as still come cheer and jump for joy when you write all the other lovely, thoughtful, insightful things you so often do. Like this wonderful piece. (And I’ll keep sharing these posts to all my friends!) Great work.
Wow I don’t blame you. In NY where we live we have UPK starting at 3yo from 9am-3pm no bussing though. Our libraries are open 9am-8pm most days.
Oh my goodness, I am so here for French parenting content. I hope you find somewhere to live soon xo
(Re)Bienvenue en France! I'm a reader from South west France its a beautiful region. Take it easy with the bureaucracy and settling in, we are looking forward to future articles
Merci! Tellement beau 🤩 j’adore
I was an au pair in Poitiers, France a decade ago and now I am mothering my own daughter in Austin, Texas and the differences are SO staggering. The amount of services and support that just exist in France is I think beyond comprehension for the average American. Looking forward to reading about your journey!
I'd love to read about comparisons between the USA and France in addition to your usually essays! I saw your post on ig about the toy car versus organic milk in both the USA and France, and I just thought: WHY?! I really do want to know why! I'd love a deep dive on the background regulatory, bureaucratic, economic environments that create that absurd situation... What are the supply & demand issues/subsidies/supply chain nuances/trade logistics, etc. behind these outcomes? I may be alone in thinking that would be interesting..😂 but if there's a researcher up to it - probably you, Elena! Félicitations pour votre déménagement!
I love that you want to know these things! So do I! My agent would like me to stay focused and she’s right 🤣 but at some point I’m sure I won’t be able to HELP looking into this because I want to KNOW!
I'm new to your publication, but as a Californian living in Québec who's spent a lot of time in the Southwest of France... everything about this article hit the spot for me! Wishing you every blessing for your family's new adventure!
Lovely post. Thrilled for you and your family (as I’ve commented before my family and I moved to Greece from Toronto for similar reasons 4 years ago). Hopefully your house hunt will be fruitful and mercifully short. In the meantime lean in to the yogurt and cheese; 10% strained Greek yogurt and bracingly large slices of feta cheese with figs got us through most of our immigration woes. Looking forward to reading more from you.
Welcome to life and motherhood abroad! I’m from Michigan but also lived for a short time in the Bay Area. I’ve been in Norway for 11 years with my Norwegian husband and we’ve been raising kids here for the past 6 of those. It’s such a gift to be over here (especially right now, and especially as a parent of little kids 😅) but also a life-long experience in grief for the home and life you left behind. Wishing you the best as you get settled!
I feel you on the trees!! I’ve lived in Europe for 10 years— 2 in Belgium and 8 in Ireland (originally from Pennsylvania). The only things I miss are proper woodland and proper summer! (The Irish literally declare a heatwave when it’s 74 Fahrenheit!) Anyways I am so looking forward to reading your observations about parenting etc in France!
I think we get a proper summer in the south of France. Northern California summers rarely passed 60 Fahrenheit haha
Lovely! What a great story and reason for going. We’ll be “neighbors” as we’re moving to southern Germany this summer. I was nervous to send my kids to German school though. I thought it might be too stressful to be thrown into another language. They’re 6 and 4yrs old.
Yeah I’m stressed about that too - it will be hard at first but what better way to learn a language? I learned French at 22 so anything is possible