You're married to a Frenchman! And moving to France! I've been following your work incessantly for the past few months, love what you do, and I too recently moved to France with a three year old and a French husband 😊 One thing's for sure, France is better with little kids.
Small world! What part of France? Yes, the social services there for families put our country to shame. It's pathetic how we fail to support families in the US. That's one of the main reasons we are leaving.
Wait, Elena, you're moving to France?! I just subscribed and was going through the archives and stumbled upon this post.
We moved to Spain about 2 years ago, outside Barcelona, in part because of the lack of support for families in the USA. Not for jobs but just to try a different system. After going through the pandemic with two kids under 4 I was like it's time to try a different version of things because this one is terrible!
Bonne chance! I really look forward to reading your comparisons of France vs. USA in terms of parenting and social/cultural supports.
You have a way of articulating unspoken emotions that come along with being human and especially a mother. I read your Substack when I’m nursing my baby at night, that is when I tend to be in search of validation and I almost always find it here.
Every major life change is hard, even if it’s a positive change. The old quote from The Office “I wish I knew we were in the good old days before we left them…” gets me every time. Enjoy the ride with your family, even the stressful and terrifying parts! These are the good old days :)
What a great quote! I feel like someone needs to tell that to the MAGA supporters. (Although, in fairness, I think capitalism was less crushing in America 70 years ago). Thanks for the support :) I'm sure everything will work out, even though it won't be perfect.
I read Nightbitch last week on your recommendation! Could not put it down. I’ll be writing about it for sure! I still need to finish your conversation with the author.
I'm Basque, from the Spanish side, living in the US. I can tell you that Basques don't hate non-Basques, we are just more introverted! But I find the French side kind of boring 😅 really recommend you explore San Sebastián (although it's very touristic and expensive) and the Bilbao area :) but France is beautiful and your kids will love it!!
Good to hear! We are French (my husband is true French and the rest of us by extension) and we speak French, not Spanish, so we will definitely settle on the French side. But I’m excited to explore the Spanish side too! Who knows, maybe our kids will end up speaking English, French, Spanish and Basque!
How wonderful! “Wherever you go, there you are.” I LOVE that. Thanks for taking us along on your adventure and for writing with authenticity and verve, Elena. “Basque” makes me think of the microhistory classic, “The Return of Martin Guerre”—have you read it? I love me some 16th century identity theft—maybe it will get you in the mood of, not everyone here is a sheep, just maybe? ❤️
This was excellent Elena! I’m not even a writer, but find that Substack is definitely a “kind of twisted, free, public therapy”. I have no friends on Substack and don’t really want any but sometimes I just want to put a hidden part of me out there. How nice to escape to France and have your children educated there!
Your dreams are beautiful, and it's inspiring to read about them coming to fruition! Looking forward to following along on your next adventure to the south of France, and *major* congrats on the upcoming book!
That's a very fair question. I had the wisdom and foresight to marry a Frenchman, ha! Actually, like everything else in my life, it was all just chance and serendipity. I graduated from college during the financial meltdown and could not find a job, so I found a gig as an English language assistant in a French high school. I planned to stay a year and then move back to the US and start my "real life" when the economy was better. Instead, I fell in love with a dude I met at a bar and stayed in France for 8 years. Then we moved back to the US 5 years ago for my job, which I ended up hating, and now we are realizing we were better off in France in many ways. So back we go.
So glad to have discovered your Substack! As a therapist working with perinatal moms I often go to the “women have been doing this (birthing, breastfeeding, mothering) since the beginning…” within our sessions. The pause this gives so many of them who are anxious because of “the experts” is powerful. Looking forward to reading more AND to your book when it comes out!
You're married to a Frenchman! And moving to France! I've been following your work incessantly for the past few months, love what you do, and I too recently moved to France with a three year old and a French husband 😊 One thing's for sure, France is better with little kids.
Small world! What part of France? Yes, the social services there for families put our country to shame. It's pathetic how we fail to support families in the US. That's one of the main reasons we are leaving.
I'm from the UK and the services are so much better here. Healthcare , childcare, education, even the roads are better 😄
Wait, Elena, you're moving to France?! I just subscribed and was going through the archives and stumbled upon this post.
We moved to Spain about 2 years ago, outside Barcelona, in part because of the lack of support for families in the USA. Not for jobs but just to try a different system. After going through the pandemic with two kids under 4 I was like it's time to try a different version of things because this one is terrible!
Bonne chance! I really look forward to reading your comparisons of France vs. USA in terms of parenting and social/cultural supports.
You have a way of articulating unspoken emotions that come along with being human and especially a mother. I read your Substack when I’m nursing my baby at night, that is when I tend to be in search of validation and I almost always find it here.
Every major life change is hard, even if it’s a positive change. The old quote from The Office “I wish I knew we were in the good old days before we left them…” gets me every time. Enjoy the ride with your family, even the stressful and terrifying parts! These are the good old days :)
What a great quote! I feel like someone needs to tell that to the MAGA supporters. (Although, in fairness, I think capitalism was less crushing in America 70 years ago). Thanks for the support :) I'm sure everything will work out, even though it won't be perfect.
Congrats Elena. Both really exciting things.
I read Nightbitch last week on your recommendation! Could not put it down. I’ll be writing about it for sure! I still need to finish your conversation with the author.
It was such a compelling read. If my own book could be half that compelling I would die a happy woman.
I honestly think she’s touching on something big. Really original book; much needed!
I'm Basque, from the Spanish side, living in the US. I can tell you that Basques don't hate non-Basques, we are just more introverted! But I find the French side kind of boring 😅 really recommend you explore San Sebastián (although it's very touristic and expensive) and the Bilbao area :) but France is beautiful and your kids will love it!!
We are also known to be very blunt and honest, and too political sometimes, so be prepared haha
Sounds good to me! I can deal with that :) I just want people to hang out with me.
Good to hear! We are French (my husband is true French and the rest of us by extension) and we speak French, not Spanish, so we will definitely settle on the French side. But I’m excited to explore the Spanish side too! Who knows, maybe our kids will end up speaking English, French, Spanish and Basque!
How wonderful! “Wherever you go, there you are.” I LOVE that. Thanks for taking us along on your adventure and for writing with authenticity and verve, Elena. “Basque” makes me think of the microhistory classic, “The Return of Martin Guerre”—have you read it? I love me some 16th century identity theft—maybe it will get you in the mood of, not everyone here is a sheep, just maybe? ❤️
Wisdom from le papa. I have a weird intuitive feeling I am going to like Basque people. And the sheep. 🐑
Absolutely love your writing style! No wonder you wanted to be a writer in the first place!
Thank you! I needed to hear that today. Writing a book is HARD. Who knew? 😆
What a wonderful update! I adore your posts and am honestly very motivated by what you’ve achieved. Thank you for pursuing your dreams so well ✨
This was excellent Elena! I’m not even a writer, but find that Substack is definitely a “kind of twisted, free, public therapy”. I have no friends on Substack and don’t really want any but sometimes I just want to put a hidden part of me out there. How nice to escape to France and have your children educated there!
Your dreams are beautiful, and it's inspiring to read about them coming to fruition! Looking forward to following along on your next adventure to the south of France, and *major* congrats on the upcoming book!
I think many of us want to know HOW you are able to move to France!!? Can we come too?
That's a very fair question. I had the wisdom and foresight to marry a Frenchman, ha! Actually, like everything else in my life, it was all just chance and serendipity. I graduated from college during the financial meltdown and could not find a job, so I found a gig as an English language assistant in a French high school. I planned to stay a year and then move back to the US and start my "real life" when the economy was better. Instead, I fell in love with a dude I met at a bar and stayed in France for 8 years. Then we moved back to the US 5 years ago for my job, which I ended up hating, and now we are realizing we were better off in France in many ways. So back we go.
Congrats! Basque Country is not for the faint of hearted- but as my favourite blue father figure would say- “it’s a good thing you’re tough!“
So glad to have discovered your Substack! As a therapist working with perinatal moms I often go to the “women have been doing this (birthing, breastfeeding, mothering) since the beginning…” within our sessions. The pause this gives so many of them who are anxious because of “the experts” is powerful. Looking forward to reading more AND to your book when it comes out!
Good luck and enjoy the wild ride! 🤩🤗🥰✨️ I am so excited for you!!